All too often we glibly say spiritually-sounding things to one another without really thinking. Cliches are easier than thinking, and we develop a spiritual shorthand of convenience without consideration. Take the idea of forgiveness, for example. We hear. . .
“Forgive and forget.”
“You have to put that behind you.”
“Let’s just move on from here.”
“Don’t let that bother you!”
“That was twenty years back. Let it go.”
But some traumas or recurring abuses leave scars which never go away, and it may sound, to a victim, as if you are discounting the pain or letting a perpetrator off easy.
Jesus makes a way to process all of this in His parable of the two debtors, in Matthew 18. Peter has asked him how many times we should be required to forgive, proposing a generous, “Seven?” Jesus responds with a remarkable, “Seventy-seven,” or “Seventy times seven,” depending upon your translation. Either way, the disciples are left wondering how that would be possible.
We should wonder, too.
But the parable leaves no doubt. The moral to the story (Matthew 18:23-35) is that we owe God an infinitely greater and unpayable debt than any mortal could owe us. Let that sink in. Jesus is saying that rather than compare debts among ourselves, keeping track according to our own standards, we are to put scorecards aside. Then, after contemplating the amazing gift we have in forgiveness, out of wonder and gratitude, we show grace to our fellow-debtor.
That makes forgiving not only bearable, but joyfully doable, and turns a potential cauldron of bitterness into a refreshing stream of love.
“And forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.”