Hi Emma …… I miss you. I am not doing well Emma. I don’t know how to do this without you. Nothing is the same. I don’t seem to care about anything much lately. The shows we used to watch, the places we used to go. I don’t bother with them anymore. I don’t know, it just seems like they were our things and now there is only me, and they don’t fit. It is true what they say sweetheart. Half of me is missing. But it feels like even more than that. It feels like all of me is missing. I kind of knew it when you were alive …… that I wouldn’t do well without you, but it is worse than that. What I would give to hold your hand. To wrap my arms around you. To tell you face to face that I love you. To just rest my hand on your shoulder like I always used to do when we were falling asleep. It is so weird Emma, but even though I am surrounded by our family … so many people that love me …. I feel so alone. No one loves me like you did. Every time we are all in a room together, my brain is telling me, “This isn’t right. Where is my sweet?”. I am trying Emma. I am. I know that you would want me to be happy, to make a life for myself, but everything is feeling so empty. I am praying all the time and asking God to help me lift my head off the pillow in the morning, but I wake up sometimes and still reach for you as if you are there and it kills me. I am trying to be thankful for the time we had, but I can’t get past living each day without my love. Don’t you remember that we were supposed to die on the same day so that neither one of us would have to go through this? How silly we were. I think we knew we were being silly, but we still wanted to believe it. We both knew how strong our love was and that if one of us left, it would be hard for the other to make it. We were right sweetie, except It’s harder than hard. I can’t bear it. No … don’t worry … I am not going to do anything to myself to get me to you sooner … but I sure wish I could. Well …. I am all talked out. How about I just stay here and arrange these flowers I brought you. I wish you could do like you used to do and stick your nose right in the center of one and breath in deep. I’ll just be here though … quiet. It helps me somehow to be here, though. I love you. Here are the flowers. Such scenes and conversations take place in graveyards all across the world. Men and women, walking in cemeteries. Looking for some way to connect with their loved one. Trying to make sense of life without them. God richly blesses us with a deep love for another, and for spouses, the two become one. How are we supposed to carry on without them? Perhaps one day I will find out. I do not know what the Lord has for Lisa and I, but I don’t want either of us to experience the pain of such loss. Yet, I know that God will see us through and give us hope and a purpose. He is gracious and merciful, and so, He will be our hope in times of trouble. Yet, as much as I know that this is true, if Lisa were to die, there is only one truth that I would hang on to the most. That thought is that I will see her again. That the grave is not the end. That we will rejoice together at the feet of our Savior. This is to be the hope for all of us who have lost loved ones. God does not want us to grieve as those who have no hope. Because of His grace, He blesses us with those we love and then, for believers, He allows us to spend an eternity together. I am sorry if this has been a sad posting for you to read. I had tears forming in my eyes as I thought of my being without Lisa. Let me leave you (and me) with the powerful testimony of God’s Word so that He can lift our heads and hearts. 51 Listen, I tell you a mystery: We will not all sleep, but we will all be changed— 52 in a flash, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trumpet. For the trumpet will sound, the dead will be raised imperishable, and we will be changed. 53 For the perishable must clothe itself with the imperishable, and the mortal with immortality. 54 When the perishable has been clothed with the imperishable, and the mortal with immortality, then the saying that is written will come true: “Death has been swallowed up in victory.”[h] 55 “Where, O death, is your victory? Where, O death, is your sting?”[i] 56 The sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law. 57 But thanks be to God! He gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ. 58 Therefore, my dear brothers and sisters, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain.” 1 Corinthians 15: 51-58 For Him, Rob