Where did she go, that mom of mine?

Posted on May 11, 2016 in Faith Focus |

It is funny how memories fade. When I was a child I had so many experiences, some of them which I am certain left a lasting impression upon me, and yet as the years go by so many of my childhood memories become inaccessible.

There are times I can recall with my mom — but, it is not as if I can sit down and flip through the many pages of a virtual book of memories and say, “Oh, I remember that time with her.” I do remember one thing quite clearly though and I want to suggest that it is the most important memory. It is the memory of her love, support, sacrifice and devotion. It is odd but as hard as I try to pull various scenes from my childhood, my efforts often fail, except for having an affirmation that I was (and still am) deeply loved by my mom. Today she spends all of her days in a nursing home bed. She is a shadow of the woman she used to be and most of the time she is so uncomfortable that any prolonged meaningful conversation with her is elusive. Yet, I can’t help but look at her and remember a vital, devoted caretaker who like the rest of us was doing much to try and embrace what life had to offer. I also remember her beauty, and when I look back at pictures of her on her wedding day or in an album it is hard to imagine that the frail woman who I see in that nursing home bed, encumbered by the passing of many years, is the same person.

Thinking about my mom reminded me of a passage in the bible that is well known to believers and non-believers:

“There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens: a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot, a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build, a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance, a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them, a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing, a time to search and a time to give up, a time to keep and a time to throw away, a time to tear and a time to mend, a time to be silent and a time to speak, a time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace.”

  [Ecclesiastes 3: 1-8]

As I read these verses from Ecclesiastes, I can almost walk with my mom through those days of old. I can think of all of her seasons, some her projects, her joys and sorrows, the love she had for my dad, and how as the years past, she had to let go of the material things which seemed to have such a place in her life.

Today, a day before Mother’s Day, everyone who will read this article will sit with their memories of their mom whether she is still alive or not. My hope is that regardless of what specific memories you can recall you are comforted by your own awareness that your mom loves / loved you and that she gave much of herself to you. If this is not the case, then I would only say that I hope God provided others who loved you deeply. Either way, know that He (God) has always loved you deeply and always will and that nothing can separate you from His love.

Tomorrow is Mother’s day and for those who have moms who are still living, you may have a chance to make more memories with them. As Solomon wrote, there is a time to “be born and a time to die” and one day our mom’s may no longer be with us. I pray that tomorrow will be “a time to embrace” your mom and if you find the idea of this hard for some reason, remember, we are all frail in our own ways and we all make mistakes, but perhaps now is “the time” to love.

In Christ’s love,

Rob

May 7, 2016

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